Delay the ritual
When the urge to check or seek reassurance comes, wait, and watch it rise and fall on its own.
This is a small piece of exposure and response prevention (ERP). If you live with OCD that takes up a lot of your day, ERP with a trained therapist is the most effective treatment; this can be a first taste, not a replacement.
In 1966, at a hospital in London, the psychologist Victor Meyer tried something new with patients whose washing and checking rituals took over their lives. OCD was then thought to be almost untreatable. Meyer's team helped patients face the things that set off their fears, and then supported them not to do the ritual afterwards.
Most of them improved, many a great deal. The approach became exposure and response prevention, refined over the following decades by researchers such as Edna Foa, and it's still the leading treatment for OCD.
The loop
It usually goes like this: a trigger, then an anxious thought ("Did I leave the hob on?"), then a strong urge, then the ritual (go back and check), then relief. The relief is real, but it teaches your brain that the check was necessary. Next time the urge is stronger.
Rituals aren't always visible. Asking someone "are you sure?", searching symptoms online, or replaying a memory to make sure all count. Response prevention means riding out the urge without the ritual, and delaying it is a gentle way to start.
Ritual, or reasonable?
Sort each one. The question is whether it's done to make an anxious feeling go away.
- Asking your partner "are you sure I locked it?" for the third time
- Locking the door once on the way out
- Searching your symptoms online after every twinge
- Seeing a doctor about a new lump
- Replaying the moment you locked the door to be sure you did
- Rewriting a message five times until it feels "just right"
0 of 6 sorted
What it can look like in Maya
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You've delayed checking for ten minutes, and the urge is still strong. What now?
Plan your delay
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Related tools
- Mindfulness
Urge surfing: ride the urge like a wave as it rises, peaks and passes.
- Buddhism
Noting: softly label it "urge" or "doubting", and let it be there.
Finish the lesson
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