What do you actually need?

Diogenes owned almost nothing: a rough cloak, folded double so he could sleep in it, a staff, a bag for food, and a wooden cup. Diogenes Laertius, who collected the stories about him some five centuries later, tells what happened to the cup:

Like most stories about Diogenes, it may be legend. It has lasted because of the question under it. He had already cut his life down to four things, and he still found one he didn't need.

The most famous story is about Alexander the Great. Diogenes was lying in the sun near Corinth when Alexander, already the most powerful man in Greece, came and stood over him and offered him anything he wanted. Diogenes asked him to stand out of his light.

Plutarch, who tells it too, adds that Alexander's companions laughed at the old man, and that Alexander said that if he were not Alexander, he would want to be Diogenes. Whether or not it happened, the point is sharp. Alexander could give almost anything. He had nothing to give someone who wanted nothing from him, and so no hold over him either.

The Cynics weren't asking everyone to live in a storage jar. They were pointing at a gap. Much of what feels like a need is a preference: the newer phone, the nicer apartment, everyone at work thinking you're brilliant. Treating a preference as a need makes losing it feel like a threat, and threats are what anxiety is made of.

Modern research points the same way. A large review of more than 250 studies found that people who put a lot of weight on money, possessions and image tend to report lower well-being, more anxiety and more low mood than people who don't.

The question to ask, Cynic style: if I lost this, would I be all right? Often the honest answer is yes, after a hard patch. Sometimes it's no, and that's worth knowing too. If you can't pay the rent, that is a real need, and no philosophy makes it smaller. The Cynic question is for wants that have dressed up as needs. Epicurus, a generation later, sorted desires in a similar way: see the lesson Sort the desire.

Which of these are needs, and which are preferences that can feel like needs?

• Somewhere safe to sleepNeedPreference
• Everyone at work thinking you're brilliantNeedPreference
• People who care about youNeedPreference
• A phone less than two years oldNeedPreference
• Enough money for rent and foodNeedPreference

0 of 5 sorted